It’s the day after Christmas. Traditionally presents are only supposed to be unwrapped today. Although I only had one gift this year, its wrapping paper went flying off even before Christmas day. Christmas this year, has been different. When I was a kid, I used to go over to my Aunt’s house in Malaysia for Christmas. It wasn’t my family who celebrating Christmas, but we just gather there during the holidays.
I remember my Aunt was very particular during Christmas. She was always trying to get the finest details right, from the decorations at the corridor to the food and presents for the kids who visited. Her family was the only Christian part of my family tree, the rest were Hindu. I still remember my first Christmas gift ever, a box of chocolates. Then there was this particular Christmas, the year after which was very different for us. When we reached her house on Christmas morning, she wasn’t around. As a kid, I didn’t know what happened, I just wanted my present. Soon after I saw my dad crying for the very first time and that’s when I realized. My aunt isn’t around anymore but I still remember the days I spent with her as a kid. Christmas was never the same again.
Many years later, straight after the crazy O levels, I got a job for the holidays. Yes, to work at Cold Storage. I had he work as an Order Taker for Christmas at Centerpoint. It was kinda like a promoter job, just of Christmas hams & turkey and all the other festive related products. The thing was there is no commission whatsoever, just $5 bucks per hour. It was during that period that I got to interact with so many different kinds of people in the form of customers. That was when I realized what Christmas was actually. When people ordered mostly food for Christmas from me (you gotta place an order and come pick it up when you want it) there surely was some time for plain old chat about Christmas. Sadly I had to work on Christmas that year, but boy was it crowded at Cold Storage that day. That was my last day at work and I kinda enjoyed it.
Talking about endings, the holidays are going to end as well. During the common test period, I was desperately in need of a break that I skipped my last paper =/ Yea, it was that bad. But when the holiday started, hours become days, days became weeks and now 2 weeks have almost past. There is only a week more till school starts. I don’t know what’s wrong with time but my days seem to pass by without me even realizing what day it is. I seriously hate the fact that my holidays are ending so soon. 3 weeks seemed extremely long in times of despair. It’s not like I achieved much during this holiday either. Just plain watching TV and playing Pokémon Sapphire and Diamond on the computer.
I don’t know what’s happening to me these days. Nothing seems complete to me. Even though I try to immerse myself with activities or hanging out with friends, I always feel there’s something missing. I don’t know, ever since I had that talk with him before the holidays I can’t seem to think straight. My mind’s wandering and my interest in communicating with others is steadily dying out. There were so many times when I wanted a miracle to save that friendship, but I guess it came too late. I am glad I had that conversation, but now my life’s just messed up.
